heyhey~! changed my wall paper :D it's supposed to mean that i'm sad because of the raindrops but i wanted another one but couldnt find it so i had to go with this ^^ which is seriously the case... i'm seriously sad.. i could cut myself soon too o.o

this two days after my birthday seriously not very nice... (obviously, if not i wouldnt be saying this ._.) got more problems, damn tired, cry alone, no comfort... its just so normal... like i've been through this before...x(

AWESOMEST DAY EVER! went to 'celebrate' birthday but ended up running away from SOME PEOPLE (so damn sorry ><) but in the end, had lots of fun :D BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!!!!!!!! WOO!

today will definitely be an unforgettable day ^^ sad can't type everything... damn tired... yawn~

NIGHTS PEEPS! WILL CONTINUE TOMORROW OR SOMETHING :D

heyhey~!

celebrated my birthday yesterday with my family :D nice cake xD also received a wallet (with $20 inside :O) from my cousin and also a Triumph necklace (uhh... i dunno what that is for but haha thx :D) anyway, had real fun and FINALLY, I'M DONE WITH MY HOMEWORK!!! WOO! AWESOME ME~!

just pretend nothing happened... i'm fine now, right? i dun wanna quarrel with you again... those days are enough... i dun wan it to happen again...

COUNTDOWN: 4 DAYS!!!

was there another meaning to you lending me that book or was it just me? cuz there are alot of ........ never mind... anyway, that book was really very cute and the scenes inside are ...LOVEly xD it's like a guy... so young, doing such romantic things to a girl!!! OMG!! never seen this kind of things but OMG!!!!!!!!! SO SWEET!!!!!

am i always like this or is it only starting this year..? i feel so different... it makes me feel so important... i dunno... i just like this feeling :3 i wanted it badly last time, and now i've gotten it :D its so cool!

i'm sorry. i can't tolerate that well. when i say i've had enough, it's not a joke. so i cannot tolerate people who keep repeating what they say, over and over about that same subject. the longest i can go is a week, maybe a few more days but if i hear it everyday, i might only be able to go for only 5 days. when there is a way to resolve it, i dun want to tell, i wan you to know what to do and act on it. dun just say, DO IT. unless you wan me to resort to stopping our friendship or even force you to stop doing it again and again... if not, i totally give up on you and let you do what you want while i pretend i'm listening or looking and daydream... i might even pretend to listen to everything you say and do something else instead. i will let my mind drift off if i find it unnecessary to listen..

i could have considered to answer that and break the chain or to not answer that and make you feel worse... there were many things i wanted to tell you... but hearing your voice, i decided not to cuz i didnt want you to be more hurt... there were many decisions i had to make... i wanted to give up... i wanted to despise love and shun it forever... i wanted to think that this kind of stuff will never ever happen on me... no happily ever after... not for me.. i once said i wanted the two of you out of my life and i decided that the time is right about now... my phone shows me evidence that i should let go and concentrate on what i am supposed to be doing... [once bitten, twice shy] i dun want to be hurt again... i don't want myself to be worried about unnecessary things like this anymore... cuz i've had enough of it... it's about time i buck up and do the right things...

i have been considering this the entire day... should i send you message?? i don't think that will be the best thing to do but i really feel that i should send you message... i seriously want to tell you how i feel... at least about our friendship ya? that it might be coming to an end... i'm seriously very indecisive now... i really want to at least talk to you like we used to... but thinking about the message i might be sending you, i think it will never happen again... never ever...